How am I not myself?

This blog serves as personal therapy, stress relief, information sharing, and the occasional sanity check. Enjoy!

We are a family! July 23, 2009

Filed under: Adoption — My Dysfunctional Life @ 8:36 pm

Well, all of my dreams have now come true…my prayers have been answered…my life is complete. I’m a momma! We brought home our new baby boy on Tuesday at two days old. Welcome Nicholas Richard Hunter!

The story is long and amazing, but I’m tired. I’ll post the details this weekend, but I just wanted to thank all of you for your unwavering support, your shoulders for my tears, and your love. I couldn’t have made this journey without all of you. XO!


Birthday Weekend July 21, 2009

Filed under: Adoption — My Dysfunctional Life @ 5:31 am

Well it was a whirlwind weekend! David’s father’s 70th birthday was this weekend, so the family was in town for a weekend-long celebration.

Friday night we all went to dinner at Mulberry’s, which boasts half-pound meatballs. I ate mine over the course of THREE days; that thing was huge! After dinner, we went on a Schooner ride around the harbor with several other friends of the family. The boat is the Spirit of Buffalo. Those of you who live in Buffalo, you have got to do this trip! It’s about a two hours long and they serve drinks. You just enjoy the sunset from the boat, feel the breeze on your face, and relax.

Saturday was a day of golf, hanging with friends at Burgerfest in Hamburg, and more eating, of course.

Sunday was brunch at the Roycroft with Gramma (she turned 96 this weekend!). Then to the harbor for a Black Crowes show on the waterfront. They sounded amazing! The weather was perfect and we had a blast.

Yesterday, David’s sister and her hubby were here hanging out. We had the parents over as well, ordered pizza and wings for dinner, followed by a Rock Band jam session. SWEET! It was a great weekend!


Adoption Language July 10, 2009

Filed under: Adoption — My Dysfunctional Life @ 8:37 am

The way we talk—and the words we choose—say a lot about what we think and value.  When we use positive adoption language, we say that adoption is a way to build a family just as birth is.  Both are important, but one is not more important than the other.

Choose the following positive adoption language instead of the negative talk that helps perpetuate the myth that adoption is second best.  By using positive adoption language, you’ll reflect the true nature of adoption, free of innuendo.

Picture 1

Words not only convey facts, they also evoke feelings.  When a TV movie talks about a “custody battle” between “real parents” and “other parents,” society gets the wrong impression that only birthparents are real parents and that adoptive parents aren’t real parents.  Members of society may also wrongly conclude that all adoptions are “battles.”

Positive adoption language can stop the spread of misconceptions such as these.  By using positive adoption language, we educate others about adoption.  We choose emotionally “correct” words over emotion-laden words.  We speak and write in positive adoption language with the hopes of impacting others so that this language will someday become the norm.


Life Perspectives July 7, 2009

Filed under: Adoption — My Dysfunctional Life @ 1:11 pm

Watching the memorial of Michael Jackson today, I am reminded that life is precious, it is a gift, and we should all be thankful every day. This was on my friend’s FB page today; I thought it fitting:

1. Life isn’t fair, but it’s still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
4. Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch.
5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
6. You don’t have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
7. Cry with someone. It’s more healing than crying alone.
8. It’s OK to get angry with God. He can take it.
9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won’t screw up the present.
12. It’s OK to let your children see you cry.
13. Don’t compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn’t be in it..
15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don’t worry; God never blinks.
16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
17. Get rid of anything that isn’t useful, beautiful or joyful.
18. Whatever doesn’t kill you really does make you stronger.
19. It’s never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.
20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don’t take no for an answer.
21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don’t save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.
23. Be eccentric now. Don’t wait for old age to wear purple.
24. The most important sex organ is the brain.
25.. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.
26.. Frame every so-called disaster with these words ‘In five years, will this matter?’
27. Always choose life.
28. Forgive everyone for everything.
29. What other people think of you is none of your business.
30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.
31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
32. Don’t take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
33. Believe in miracles.
34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn’t do.
35. Don’t audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
36. Growing old beats the alternative — dying young.
37. Your children get only one childhood.
38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else’s,we’d grab ours back.
41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
42. The best is yet to come.
43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
44. Yield.
45. Life isn’t tied with a bow, but it’s still a gift.

Written By Regina Brett, 90 years old.


Congrats to the new families! July 6, 2009

Filed under: Adoption — My Dysfunctional Life @ 9:12 pm

It seems that our adoption agency has been very busy lately! Several waiting families have had placements or matches in the last couple of months. It’s wonderful! One family had been waiting two years and they brought home their new little boy just over a week ago. Another is matched with a birthmother, and yet another adopted their second child (from the same BM). David and I were also visiting our agency a few weeks ago and saw a couple in there signing papers. I am so excited that all of these forever families are being created.

As for us, we have been profiled once in the last couple of months, but didn’t get chosen. I’m hoping this summer brings us a baby to call our own. In the meantime, we are going to a meeting in a couple of weeks to learn about the Erie Co. foster care program. We do not want to be foster parents (we just don’t think we couldn’t take the “giving back” part). We just want to see about the foster to adopt program and what it entails. I figure it can’t hurt, and it will make us FEEL like something is happening at least. Right now, we feel like we are in a holding pattern so any change is welcome at this point.

We’ve been holding up well so far, but the wait it’s taking its toll. We go for a bike ride or walk in the neighborhood every night and see all of the new moms and dads walking with their babies in strollers. I have seen quite a few pregnant women as well…we smile and say hello, then look at each other at sigh. Our time is coming…I just wish it would hurry up! 😉